Remember how I told you about Ben Sherman Boy at work and how his cubical is probably less than 30 feet away from mine but because we are on different "teams" I rarely see him or talk to him? Well, he's not the only one I don't talk too.. I blame the clique-esque feel at work purely on the "team" seating arrangements.
You can kind of think of my work set up as a SUPER small scale of the cafeteria on the movie, "Mean Girls."
"You've got your: Freshmen, ROTC guys, preps, J.V. jocks, Asian nerds, Cool Asians, Varsity jocks, Unfriendly black hotties, Girls who eat their feelings, Girls who don't eat anything, Desperate wannabes, Burnouts, Sexually active band geeks, the greatest people you will ever meet...and the worst: Beware of plastics." --Janice, Mean Girls.
OK, so we don't have all of those categories and we aren't intentionally stuck up to each other but we are divided into teams, we sit in our designated areas, and we choose to rarely talk to each other. However, I seem to know A LOT about some of these people that I've never talked to. How? Eavesdropping!
It's kind of hard NOT to listen when 1.) even though we are divided into cubes we are still all in one large open space. 2.) I'm good and eavesdropping and 3.) I enjoy it.
Today was one of the days where I wished I would have had popcorn because the convos going on amongst some of the other teams were THAT entertaining.
There's this one lady, who I will refer to as Ms. X, who ONLY talks about dating. She is quite a bit older, LDS, single, supposedly goes on lots of dates and basically thinks she is "PimpMasterZ" even though she is still single. not kidding.
Most of the time when Ms. X talks about personal things I usually roll my eyes or silently whisper things under my breath while carrying on with my work. But today, two other girls on my team and I literally stopped everything we were doing just so we could listen to Ms. X give dating advice to another older (40's), single, LDS, male coworker who we actually converse with often.
The gist of the convo was that the male coworker went on a blind date last night. Ms. X asked him how it went and he replied, "uhh, she was nice" basically insinuating that she wasn't attractive. He then went on to ask Ms. X what a guy should do if a girl you've taken out before calls and wants to hang out or to go out again but you aren't interested in dating her?
Ms. X then responded with terrible advice. Here's what she gave him as option 1. And I quote:
"If she calls then you just say, 'I'm sorry. I just don't think we're a match' or 'There was just something missing'."
Maybe I'm alone in this, but if a guy came out and told me that we weren't a "match" after one date I would literally laugh in his face, tell him to get over himself, and then agree with him! And if he told me "there was something missing" after one date I would be like, "uhh yeah, we don't know anything about each other. Hello, dummy!" And then I would peace out because of how stupid he just sounded. I mean, maybe there could be "something missing" after you get to know a person but after one dinner date you might as well just be telling the girl that you think she's ugly because that is how she is most likely going to take it. haha.
Then Ms. X went on and said:
"It's kind of risky but the other option is to say 'I actually had a good time with you but the whole time I was thinking that you would be a better match for my friend."
Is she wanting him to sounds like a D-bag? If so...mission a-freaking-ccomplished, lady! I guess that would most likely complete your mission of letting her know that you clearly aren't interested, but I just can't imagine saying this to someone I just went on a date with or especially having someone say this to me after a date. It's like, "I don't know what my friend was thinking when they set us up, but let me just pawn you off onto my other friend..." rude.
I was getting fired up by everything Ms. X was saying this morning. It's people like her that make dating way harder than it already is. Plain and simple(Jenn's rules)--There is no need for an explanation after one date! My advice to my coworker (and all other guys who have wondered about the same thing) would have been something like this: "You're the guy so if you don't like a girl and you don't want to ask her out again after one date then simply don't call her or text her. viola! Done. No explanation needed. I promise that the sane girls will get the point and won't call you for a follow up if you haven't called them after your first date."
Note to all girls--If guys didn't think we were so dramatic or that we took first dates so seriously, then 1) they would go on more dates and 2) they wouldn't be put into situations like this where they have to think long and hard of what kind of bull crap they are going to tell us to let us off easy. So let's just all collectively TRY to relax a little bit to take off some of that pressure. Just because he asks you on a first date doesn't mean that he wants to marry you, OK? But if you were giving him signs that you were interested but he doesn't call and ask you on a second or that third date, then he's not interested and doesn't want to ask you out again. Just let him be the one to make the "second date move" :)
SO, my dearest little boys and girls--Let's do each other a favor and just keep it simple, OK!?
Isn't eavesdropping fun!?
1 comment:
You're are so right!!
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