"I would rather do drugs than this."

I've always been a pretty big chicken when it comes to doing anything in the water and anywhere that involves my feet not touching the ground or falling.  For example.  I don't do diving boards, I hate ice skating and walking down steep hills, I don't care for swimming in open water, and heck, I don't even like walking in ice because of my fear of falling.  Although each are a titch irrational, they are all very real.  I never planned on this holding me back from doing things that most people find fun.  Honest.  There have been multiple times where I've really desired to do some of these things by my brain just stops me.

This weekend a few of my friends convinced me to go to Causey Reservoir with them.  Knowing I didn't like doing most of the things  that they would be doing, I really wanted to go and have fun with them and be in the sun.  I went and wasn't disappointed with how beautiful it was there:

I feel bad for my friends for having to put up with my screaming about everything and the fact that I'm kind of a baby but they got a kick out of making fun of me.  [rude].  Most people think that I'm just super dramatic, which I am... but honestly, every time I was scared of doing something yesterday, I wasn't just being dramatic.  I was scared to get in the Kayak because thoughts like "what if I get tipped? what if I get attacked by a giant 'WHO KNOWS WHAT' that could be living in this open water," you know.. crap like that.  My brain is weird and quiet frankly it makes me mad because it wins most of the time.  But not yesterday.

My friends are really convincing.  They made me get in the kayak, they tipped me over, I was cold, I whined..you know.  Normal stuff.  But not normal for me.  I think it's good to have friends who push you to do things that really aren't going to hurt you.  OK, besides the cliff jumping thing.  I didn't really want to go because we all know how my family and rocks mix but my friends, knowing that deep inside I wanted to be able to do it, helped me over the ledge and gave me pep talks (and laughed at me behind my back haha) until after what seemed like an hour, I was able to jump off the HIGH cliff into the water.  We won't talk about all of the screaming and the fact that I hit my face and chest so hard on the water. (yeah, it happened).  But let's just say, I did it and I was entertainment for EVERYONE at Causey that day.  Pretty sure people a mile away heard me scream...before, during and.. ummm.. after the jump.  I honestly just can't believe I even climbed up the rocks to begin with.  I mean, I don't do stuff like that.

Well, I guess there's a first time for everything.   Sure, I have a bad sun burn on my shoulders, my swim shorts ripped COMPLETELY up the side from the jump, my throat hurts from screaming and I feel like death... But I'm glad I did it once.  I didn't die.  Sure, we were all a little scared that I wasn't going to pop back up out of the water alive but I did and I'm fine.

I think it's good to have people to push you to do things, as long as they are positive things.  I really did want to be able to jump off the cliff and they knew that.  And I did it.  Sometimes you just have to have people to encourage you and grab your arm to help you get to the ledge so you can make that jump at whatever it is you want to do.

Whatever it is.. just be careful.  That's what I've learned.

yeah... I don't need to jump off a cliff again anytime soon but man was it a fun day with great friends :)
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On a not-so-happy side note: I'm so sick of flakey people.  Can we all do each other a favor?  If you say you're going to do something--do it!  I mean, unless you have a really good reason, of which I would totally understand.

That is all.