"People would have to literally peel my sweat pants off."
We were all sitting in the car talking about how great it would be to work from home and then Jenn just laid this one on us, taking it to a completely new level. The conversation continued on to talk about bed sores and really letting ourselves reach a black hole of despair and shower-less days. But for real, imagine PEELING someones sweat pants off. As if the term SWEAT pants isn't enough... now we are peeling them off, I cannot.
"I bet its just scar tissue.......... Unless your twin is in there"
Ok, weirdest quote award. Let me explain. A few weeks ago I was in a car accident and I bit through my lip resulting in a small scar below my lip that feels really hard. I've sort of been worried about it lately and I've been making everyone touch it. It really is just scar tissue in there but it kind of does feel like there might be something stuck in it. Most people when they feel it say, "is there glass in it?" or "maybe its a rock." Leave it to Jenn to guess that I have my undeveloped twin living in my lip. It probably would make a really great reality T.V. series, and Jenn is all about reality T.V. so I guess maybe it makes sense now.
"Do you think its cute?" -me
"I Don't like its beady eyes, I mean really, think about the fact that it can see through that eye hole"
Reading this you might think that we are talking about a snake or a fish or something super creepy that might be cute if you're a little weird, you know what I mean. But no, we are talking about a duck, a little baby duckling. If you can't imagine how cute these things are go ahead and look them up on google images. These things are adorable. I showed Jenn a picture of a baby duck that I held at Coleman's work and this was her reaction. HA!! seriously, it is still beyond me how baby ducks could be creepy, but she did have a point about its beady eye.
"GRAVITY!! it's the freakinest weirdest."
recently Jenn quoted Nieko saying "how bad did you scream on a scale of 1 to starship 5000" or something like this. I guess Jenn went on a ride at the fair last summer that scared her really bad and Nieko even has a video of it which really is funny. We watched the video of her doing it and then proceeded to watch people on YouTube doing it as well. Even just talking about the Starship 5000 made Jenn get all fired up, she was basically freaking out about how odd gravity was, she was so fired up that she started making up new words. #freakinest
"I don't want some rinky dink hot dog."
Okay, first things first, Rinky Dink?????? Someone PLEASE tell me where she gets these things. pretty much the best descriptive word on the planet and even better when you are talking about hot dogs. For weeks Jenn has been wanting a hot dog. When I mentioned that we could walk over to Walmart and get some hot dogs this is what she exclaimed. What is a non-rinky dink hot dog? A Costco hot dog, according to Jenn that is.
"That makes me so sad, Oh my gosh I'm so glad to have eyebrows."
We were watching Jackass where one of the guys is getting waxed all over his body. They finally got to his face and they waxed off his eyebrows. I will admit that he did look really creepy. But Jenn got really upset about it and felt so bad for the poor guy. This immediately made us spend the rest of the night looking up celebrities without eyebrows. But for real who knew they made up such a big part of the anti creepiness of your face. So of course because I knew how much it upset Jenn, I spent the next day photoshopping Jenn's eyebrows off. Hahahah best half hour I've ever spent.
"I love the Red gum, Jokes on you I ate them both, I eat all the things."
So the other night we were just sitting around the counter and Jenn had this little thing of gum that was shaped like eggs in an egg carton. Jenn was talking about how great the red gum was. When I reached over to grab the second red gum she quickly put it in her mouth. So then when I reached for a different color she proceeded to take all twelve pieces of gum and shove them all in her mouth just so I couldn't get one. I want you guys to be able to imagine this right, The whole time she kept a straight face, both of her cheeks filled with gum, one eyebrow raised, looking at me and letting me know she was queen. HA!! then as I sat there feeling like a peasant she said the last part of the quote as she put the plastic carton in her mouth. "I eat all the things."
side note-- she didn't really eat the plastic. #LongLiveTheQueen
"Well she needs a drink of water."
As great as General Conference is there is one thing about it that I just can't handle and that is all the mouth noises. That microphone they use is top of the line because you can hear every movement their tongue makes and every smack of the lips. This one lady in particular was reallllyyy lip smacky, everyone was thinking it... Jenn just said it.
"My whole life is in there"
"No it's not" -Sam
"Yes it is, I'm having an out of body experience."
Those Hansen's you guys are quick on their feet. As we were leaving to go to dinner Jenn was double checking that someone had locked the door. Sam remarked it doesn't matter and Jenn replied that it did because her whole life was in there. Sam was quick to tell her it wasn't and Jenn was even quicker to prove him wrong. It's sometimes so hard to not take her serious because she says these things so quickly and with the straightest face. One time she even convinced me her dad was a real clown that went to clown school. True Story.
Well there you have it. I have more but I honestly can't remember why they were said even though they still make me laugh. Like this one that says "He is doing a really great impression of a hot dog." Jenn sure does love hot dogs. I wish I could remember what she was talking about. Anyway we all know Jenn is the best and the funniest girl around so she needed some recognition for that. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN.
Love you Jenn!
We were all sitting in the car talking about how great it would be to work from home and then Jenn just laid this one on us, taking it to a completely new level. The conversation continued on to talk about bed sores and really letting ourselves reach a black hole of despair and shower-less days. But for real, imagine PEELING someones sweat pants off. As if the term SWEAT pants isn't enough... now we are peeling them off, I cannot.
"I bet its just scar tissue.......... Unless your twin is in there"
Ok, weirdest quote award. Let me explain. A few weeks ago I was in a car accident and I bit through my lip resulting in a small scar below my lip that feels really hard. I've sort of been worried about it lately and I've been making everyone touch it. It really is just scar tissue in there but it kind of does feel like there might be something stuck in it. Most people when they feel it say, "is there glass in it?" or "maybe its a rock." Leave it to Jenn to guess that I have my undeveloped twin living in my lip. It probably would make a really great reality T.V. series, and Jenn is all about reality T.V. so I guess maybe it makes sense now.
"Do you think its cute?" -me
"I Don't like its beady eyes, I mean really, think about the fact that it can see through that eye hole"
Reading this you might think that we are talking about a snake or a fish or something super creepy that might be cute if you're a little weird, you know what I mean. But no, we are talking about a duck, a little baby duckling. If you can't imagine how cute these things are go ahead and look them up on google images. These things are adorable. I showed Jenn a picture of a baby duck that I held at Coleman's work and this was her reaction. HA!! seriously, it is still beyond me how baby ducks could be creepy, but she did have a point about its beady eye.
"GRAVITY!! it's the freakinest weirdest."
recently Jenn quoted Nieko saying "how bad did you scream on a scale of 1 to starship 5000" or something like this. I guess Jenn went on a ride at the fair last summer that scared her really bad and Nieko even has a video of it which really is funny. We watched the video of her doing it and then proceeded to watch people on YouTube doing it as well. Even just talking about the Starship 5000 made Jenn get all fired up, she was basically freaking out about how odd gravity was, she was so fired up that she started making up new words. #freakinest
"I don't want some rinky dink hot dog."
Okay, first things first, Rinky Dink?????? Someone PLEASE tell me where she gets these things. pretty much the best descriptive word on the planet and even better when you are talking about hot dogs. For weeks Jenn has been wanting a hot dog. When I mentioned that we could walk over to Walmart and get some hot dogs this is what she exclaimed. What is a non-rinky dink hot dog? A Costco hot dog, according to Jenn that is.
"That makes me so sad, Oh my gosh I'm so glad to have eyebrows."
We were watching Jackass where one of the guys is getting waxed all over his body. They finally got to his face and they waxed off his eyebrows. I will admit that he did look really creepy. But Jenn got really upset about it and felt so bad for the poor guy. This immediately made us spend the rest of the night looking up celebrities without eyebrows. But for real who knew they made up such a big part of the anti creepiness of your face. So of course because I knew how much it upset Jenn, I spent the next day photoshopping Jenn's eyebrows off. Hahahah best half hour I've ever spent.
"I love the Red gum, Jokes on you I ate them both, I eat all the things."
So the other night we were just sitting around the counter and Jenn had this little thing of gum that was shaped like eggs in an egg carton. Jenn was talking about how great the red gum was. When I reached over to grab the second red gum she quickly put it in her mouth. So then when I reached for a different color she proceeded to take all twelve pieces of gum and shove them all in her mouth just so I couldn't get one. I want you guys to be able to imagine this right, The whole time she kept a straight face, both of her cheeks filled with gum, one eyebrow raised, looking at me and letting me know she was queen. HA!! then as I sat there feeling like a peasant she said the last part of the quote as she put the plastic carton in her mouth. "I eat all the things."
side note-- she didn't really eat the plastic. #LongLiveTheQueen
"Well she needs a drink of water."
As great as General Conference is there is one thing about it that I just can't handle and that is all the mouth noises. That microphone they use is top of the line because you can hear every movement their tongue makes and every smack of the lips. This one lady in particular was reallllyyy lip smacky, everyone was thinking it... Jenn just said it.
"My whole life is in there"
"No it's not" -Sam
"Yes it is, I'm having an out of body experience."
Those Hansen's you guys are quick on their feet. As we were leaving to go to dinner Jenn was double checking that someone had locked the door. Sam remarked it doesn't matter and Jenn replied that it did because her whole life was in there. Sam was quick to tell her it wasn't and Jenn was even quicker to prove him wrong. It's sometimes so hard to not take her serious because she says these things so quickly and with the straightest face. One time she even convinced me her dad was a real clown that went to clown school. True Story.
Well there you have it. I have more but I honestly can't remember why they were said even though they still make me laugh. Like this one that says "He is doing a really great impression of a hot dog." Jenn sure does love hot dogs. I wish I could remember what she was talking about. Anyway we all know Jenn is the best and the funniest girl around so she needed some recognition for that. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN.
Love you Jenn!
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