Anyone who knows me understands that the dumbest things make me cry. This one time someone told me about a relationship gone sour and I was heartbroken about it for almost a week. The problem? I didn't even know the people. Sadly, this has been known to happen more than a few times.
I've decided that I've been cursed with a few things in my life which usually end in tears or just a lot of over thinking...
The first curse being my annoying expectation of greatness. When I get to know someone, I know what they are capable and I expect greatness out of them (of course while still knowing that we all have flaws). Simple as that. This also means that I tend to set even more outrageous standards for myself and end up disappointed a lot more than I'd like. (I just want to note that I just deleted a good chunk of what I had written on this draft a couple of days ago. Good thing I jot things down in the heat of the moment and sometimes just push save instead of publish. embarrassinggggg).
I'm not going to confess anything specific because I realized that while I would like this to just be my personal journal, there a few people who actually read this crap. So, no confessions other than to let you know that I'm not perfect. duh. I'm far from it actually. I do set high expectations and right now I'm just really working on conjuring up that motivation I know I have within me somewhere to make things a little bit better than they are now. But it's hard and I get discouraged just like every one else. I make mistakes, I let things go too far and I sometimes do things without thinking about the consequences *Cue sad music on my iphone and tears in the shower*
(it's funny that you think I'm exaggerating right now.)
We get that way sometimes don't we? We get lazy, things get bad, we kick, scream (cry in the shower), we feel sorry for ourselves and we just want to know WHY things get so hard. Why are we so weak? Why do we even have the desire to be good? Wouldn't it just be easier if we could give into temptations and just do whatever we wanted and be lazy for the rest of our lives and never progress or get better, be better, or do better?
preach.
I totally believe that it's OK to think like that sometimes but I really don't like to give myself too much time to feel sorry for myself...that comes with the before mentioned "curse" ^^. I don't like feeling weak. Although, I know I'm weak and to my dismay pathetic at times, I believe that feeling sorry for yourself for too long is stupid. If you're spending too much time feeling sorry for yourself, then that means you aren't working towards turning things around. With that being said, the shower is my time. I ugly cry in there almost monthly.
I don't tell you that to make you feel bad for me or to think that I'm a crazy person. I just totally need that time, and I'm OK with that.
Some people run it off, some people scream into the pillow for a minute, and I ...cry in the shower. And guess what? I always end up feeling better. I get it out, and immediately start making plans for what I'm going to do that day/week/month to do a little bit better.
So maybe you don't cry in the shower or cry at all...but I highly recommend finding a place or something you can do to give yourself a little reality check from time to time when things get hard or when you are weak. Let yourself be pathetic for a second but be sure you make plans to change it and move on. Whatever it is, make it your time and make it something that makes you feel better.
I'd ask you to join me so you can see what I'm talking about, but the shower invite would be like, super awkward. It's personal time. Give yourself that 10 minutes. Run it out, scream it out, cry it out.. do what you got to do and then--keep the faith :)
I'm not going to confess anything specific because I realized that while I would like this to just be my personal journal, there a few people who actually read this crap. So, no confessions other than to let you know that I'm not perfect. duh. I'm far from it actually. I do set high expectations and right now I'm just really working on conjuring up that motivation I know I have within me somewhere to make things a little bit better than they are now. But it's hard and I get discouraged just like every one else. I make mistakes, I let things go too far and I sometimes do things without thinking about the consequences *Cue sad music on my iphone and tears in the shower*
(it's funny that you think I'm exaggerating right now.)
We get that way sometimes don't we? We get lazy, things get bad, we kick, scream (cry in the shower), we feel sorry for ourselves and we just want to know WHY things get so hard. Why are we so weak? Why do we even have the desire to be good? Wouldn't it just be easier if we could give into temptations and just do whatever we wanted and be lazy for the rest of our lives and never progress or get better, be better, or do better?
preach.
I totally believe that it's OK to think like that sometimes but I really don't like to give myself too much time to feel sorry for myself...that comes with the before mentioned "curse" ^^. I don't like feeling weak. Although, I know I'm weak and to my dismay pathetic at times, I believe that feeling sorry for yourself for too long is stupid. If you're spending too much time feeling sorry for yourself, then that means you aren't working towards turning things around. With that being said, the shower is my time. I ugly cry in there almost monthly.
I don't tell you that to make you feel bad for me or to think that I'm a crazy person. I just totally need that time, and I'm OK with that.
Some people run it off, some people scream into the pillow for a minute, and I ...cry in the shower. And guess what? I always end up feeling better. I get it out, and immediately start making plans for what I'm going to do that day/week/month to do a little bit better.
So maybe you don't cry in the shower or cry at all...but I highly recommend finding a place or something you can do to give yourself a little reality check from time to time when things get hard or when you are weak. Let yourself be pathetic for a second but be sure you make plans to change it and move on. Whatever it is, make it your time and make it something that makes you feel better.
I'd ask you to join me so you can see what I'm talking about, but the shower invite would be like, super awkward. It's personal time. Give yourself that 10 minutes. Run it out, scream it out, cry it out.. do what you got to do and then--keep the faith :)
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